I'm finding it easier.
I'm beginning to understand what a friend of mine told me when I asked him how he lost so much weight. He looked at me and said "I am so hungry bro".
At first that didn't make sense to me.
What is hunger?
...
I hadn't felt it in so long. I had stopped waking up hungry because my body was still processing food from the night before. I was constantly full.
That is... wrong. I wasn't in control at all, not of my urges, my body or life. So for someone to tell me they were so hungry made me think. A lot. I recently found the opportunity to be hungry. With enough distraction you can forget a habit like overeating briefly. Oh god it was uncomfortable at first. Hunger felt so foreign and bizarre. I kept in mind what you said though. I didn't rush out and eat heaps. I stayed hungry. Just a little.
Not eating so much made me very tired.
After a couple of days I started to turn down junk food other people offered me.
Today I let myself get too hungry and I cheated on my diet. Gross.
I'm ashamed I have to put such a disgusting dinner in my food diary.
If I'm going to do this I need to accept that I'm going to be hungry. I'm going to miss out on some things. I'm going to have to turn down treats.
I think I'm going to be ok with that.
My new job is a great distraction from hunger. They provide fresh fruit everyday and my colleagues know my weight loss goals. Also having a solid rountine is a great help in figuring out meal plans. I'm slowly working towards being the grown up I want to be, I just need to fight against myself every day to get there. I have proven I can eat well to myself, I have proven I can exercise now I have to combine them into a solid rountine.
I have never been very good with change, some of us are very set in our ways. Its a huge change feeling hungry. The new job is a huge change too. But to be honest I think a few huge changes are exactly what I need right now.
Eli Nelson
